I think one of the demands we most grapple with as Christians is how to lovingly and peaceably deal with unpleasant people and relationships. It's a tough one. So often I hear, "It is okay to eject mean or contentions people from our lives because wrong treatment should not be put up with." I wonder how Jesus feels about that? I will insert here, I understand well the struggle, and am passing judgment on no one but myself. But I feel strongly that it is a subject worth sharing.
Difficult people are difficult to deal with, plain and simple. But when considering the verse "He that saith he abideth in Him ought himself also so to walk, even as He [Jesus] walked" (1 John 2:6) we mustn't overlook the sufferings of Christ while He walked this earth. Peter stated it this way, "For this is thankworthy, if a man for conscience toward God endure grief, suffering wrongfully. ....but if, when ye do well, and suffer for it, ye take it patiently, this is acceptable with God. For even hereunto were ye called: because Christ also suffered for us, leaving us an example, that ye should follow in His steps: Who did no sin, neither was guile found in His mouth: Who, when He was reviled, reviled not again, when He suffered, He threatened not; but entrusted Himself to Him that judgeth righteously (1 Peter 2:19,23).
If we read our Bibles at all, we cannot deny that there is scripture upon scripture about how we are to treat all people, including those who hate us....."Love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that hate you, and pray for them that despitefully use you, and persecute you" (Matthew 5:44), "...walk worthy of the vocation wherewith ye are called, with all lowliness and meekness, with longsuffering, forbearing one another in love; endeavoring to keep the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace" (Ephesians 4:1-3). The list goes on, and I have found no where in the Bible where it says that it is acceptable to eject people from our lives simply because they have mistreated us, or they are difficult or contentious. But I will be the first to admit, loving those who repeatedly do us wrong is no easy task, and it is for certain, doing so in a way that is Christ-like, can only be done through Christ. I will let it be known that this is something I struggle with, and I have personally asked God, how does one love, respect and honor those who are hateful, selfish, unkind, and who do not respect others? And what He revealed to me was this....we do not respect or honor people because they have earned it from us, but BECAUSE Jesus earned it for them by His love and sacrifice on the cross For All Mankind. That was quite an ouchy for me. I could certainly argue that some people are just plain mean, but I most certainly can not argue with the fact that Jesus died for mean people as well as kind people, and not only does He love them, but He expects me to love them as well, ( and I think it only right to say here that it's not simply for their good, but for ours). Make no mistake, God places people in our lives for a reason and for the good of both parties. If we can't, through Christ, love the unlovable and forgive the unforgivable, where does that leave us? and how shall we ever show the world the love of Jesus if we refuse to humble ourselves to His way of loving?
The verse that struck me the most on the true nature of our struggle in this world pertaining to ourselves and the human race was found in Ephesians 6:12, and I have found it to be not only a comfort, but a source of wisdom and strength, "For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms" (Ephesians 6:12 NIV).
I end on this note: If you are like me and are struggling to love the difficult people in your life, running away from them is not the answer; instead, let us run to Jesus, as often as necessary, to accomplish His purpose and glorify God in His command, "that we should believe on the name of His Son Jesus Christ, and love one another" (1 John 3:23).
